full screen mode

(might as well blog about this since it's only temporary anyway.)

i had a bad weekend. i still feel terrible and grumpy about it. it started sunday afternoon. i told chaida to go on ahead for mass. i said i'll just catch mass later but that i'll meet her for our weekend grocery shopping.

i met lotis on my way out the door. i told her that chaida was in church hearing mass and that i was meeting her for groceries. "i had told her to go on ahead without me," i explained, "because i was still planning my life."

lotis laughed. then she told me that it was raining. "it's raining?" i didn't hear any rain. "well, it's so dark outside, it's going to. bring an umbrella." i showed her the umbrella i held in my hands.

true enough, sheets of rain started to pour as i made my way across the street to stand on a curb, waiting for a jeep. i waited for a while, which seemed unusual. perhaps it was the rain? i finally caught one and it was full and hefty inside, and i was fully sandwiched in between people.

the jeep arrived at the mall. i got off and i sensed that something had fallen but didn't pay it any attention. i should have. i was already inside the mall when i started to look for my eyeglasses and didn't find them on me or in my bag. that was when i knew. i had hooked it on the front of my blouse and it had fallen off.

so i re-traced my way back to the jeepney stop where in one of the most woebegone moments of my life, i stood there on the sidewalk, my naked and remorseful eyes vainly searching the street stones for some sign of shards of glass or plastic, or any sort of debris from what might have once been a pair of eyeglasses that once belonged to me. cars whizzed past as i stood there and i knew that if my eyeglasses had fallen on the hard of the street that fateful moment, it was a goner for good. under the crush of cruel and indifferent tires, it had no chance of survival.

i was glum when i met with chaida. i reported to her what happened and the reason for my lateness. by this time, chaida was already done with shopping so i decided to forego my own trip along the grocery aisles and head for home.

we were in the taxi when i noticed the cute furry animal toy the driver had on his dashboard.

"ang cute ng squirrel," i said to chaida.

"that's not a squirrel, that's a dog!" she replied.

oh. sorry. when we got home, we apprised lotis of the situation. lotis laughed. "she said she was planning her life...nawala tuloy glasses niya!"

"it was unforeseen!" i said, while sitting on a chair drinking milk tea that i had bought to comfort me. it did not make up for my lost eyeglasses, but food and drinks in times of distress can sometimes have the power to feel like a band of arm thrown over my shoulders when i needed one.

"how are you going to hear mass now, cor? when everything you see are squirrels..." lotis asked, speaking to me in the visayan vernacular.

she has a point. how was i supposed to get by in the world with such an altered perception of reality?! i'd be in church and wonder what a chipmunk in white clothes was doing celebrating mass.

i made my way back to the mall and morosely did my groceries sans my other eyes. i got a coconut and asked a lady in the grocery to have the juice extracted and the shell cut in two. while i waited, i contemplated my lot. i had been so looking forward to planning my life. this was what this was all about. it's why i was so upset. here i was desperately striving for an enlightened approach to life and now this?! did i now have to wait for a few more days to attain some sort of clarity?!

but unfortunately, that was not all. yesterday was, apparently, murphy's law day. anything that could go wrong will. because later that night, when it was almost time for bed, i saw that i had forgotten to clean the bathroom after my bath earlier. i still had my stuff there. usually, i would scoop everything up before i leave it because i share it with chaida and now i see that i had neglected even to do that.

chaida reminded me of my stuff and i was annoyed at yet another evidence of uncarefulness. i ranted: why is the world against me today?! i'm NEVER planning my life again!

and still, the story does not end there. when i was washing the dishes that night, the handle of the cup-bowl in my hands broke off of its own accord. i didn't even drop the thing and i had broken it. huh?

i knew it could only mean one thing: the stars in my universe were just not in proper alignment that day. hence, the minor chaos and the random bad luck. i would have to wait for a better day, when the alignment of the stars is better and more inclined in my favor.

and perhaps i should buy a new pair of glasses now. or else everything in the world will come out in squirrels and chipmunks and monitors in full screen mode. god help me.

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